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Back to basics

BY BETT KINYATTI

I’ve been really struggling to write here.

It isn’t a situation of a creative slump more than it is just plain old slack. I also got a new writing gig that’s taking the best of me. One has only a limited number of tight sentences in any one day, the main platter. I used to bring this main platter to Craft It and give to the others the crumbs that were falling off the table.

But there’s been a hostile takeover. The tables have been turned. What’s worse, there don’t seem to be any crumbs that are even falling off the table for Craft It. So it gets nothing. (Well, except some monster Muna drew on the living room wall with a permanent red marker pen. She called him a monster, I thought he looked like a man nursing a nasty tooth ache.

I wasn’t peeved that she’d drawn on the wall – that’s parenting 101, little else is more important than her exploration and growth. She can draw on walls, sip surgical spirit. There’s a button from my laptop that has been missing for weeks, I’m certain it’s in the pit of her belly.

Anyway, what had me scoff in delight is that she’d drawn a decipherable figure that had eyes and a mouth and a head. With some twisted proportion, granted, but worthy of an applause. I named the bastard Paul. Now I’m writing silly snippets on my Instastories about the adventures of Paul. OK, OK, I’ve only written two now but hey, it’s worth the mention. I think it’s going to be silly and fun. I like silly and fun.)

Like I said, I’m struggling creatively with writing here.

Back when I was getting into writing professionally in 2013, I didn’t have anyone I was writing for so I’d do a free writing exercise every day. A free writing exercise was a loose 1,000 words daily about frivolous emotions.

If I mine through them, I may find a few diamonds in the rough. Most of it though, was to write so I could get comfortable with putting my thoughts into words, and my words onto the page. I didn’t see its greater purpose back then – because it was time in the trenches – but it helped me build my creative muscle and writing discipline.

Our Craft It community here is an intimate community. (Polite word for ‘small’.) I like you guys. I really do. Writing here feels like we’re sitting across from each other on a table, chatting over sundowners. You’re a good bunch of people. Civil, chill. You’re also shy – you’d guys would rather email or WhatsApp me in private than leave a public comment. I like that you’re also more forgiving of my shortcomings, especially with my inconsistency.

Not that I take you for granted – far from it – I appreciate that you set up camp here for a few minutes to read what’s gone up. No matter how far apart they are.

I’m lowering my writing standards here. No, I’m not even lowering them. I’m throwing them all out the window – I won’t have any standards at all. My new standard is No standard.

I’m doing this because I need to get out of this creative rut I’ve found myself in.

I’ll do the 1,000 words and post them here as the story to go for the day. I may delete them later, or I may not – it all depends on how the week unfurls. And how I wake up feeling. Nowadays I’m all about feelings.

First up, an email from a reader. Her name is Nyambura:

Dear Bett,
How are you doing now? I read your Life lately article and it broke my heart. I sent you virtual hugs.  

I’m terribly sorry about your ordeal, God’s comfort to you.  

I don’t know how appropriate this is right now, I needed some guidance on a new domain I’m trying to register.  

I’ve realised I’m struggling with what to call it, but I know I don’t want to call it nyambura.co.ke 

How did you come up with your blog name? What would you advice me to consider?  

Also, how does your blog bring in cash? 

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks in advance,
Nyambura.  

~

Nyambura.
Right off the bat, thank you sparing us the agony and not opening your email with ‘I trust this finds you well’. Or, ‘I hope this finds you well’. Or anything that desires to ‘find me well’.

Those plus other 2019 buzzwords have me want to put a sling around my neck. Others are words like ‘intentional’ and ‘deliberate’, ‘vulnerable’. “I’m being intentional about putting myself out there.” “I’m deliberate with not putting up a glossy curated life on my Instagram timeline, I don’t want to appear perfect yet the truth is, I fear being vulnerable.”

And ‘space’. Does anyone else want to gag when they hear it? “I want to make my space more beautiful.” “I want a space where folk with mental health issues can express themselves in a healthy way, where they won’t feel judged.” “I’m in this space where I’m doubting my adequacy as a mother.”

Christ.

If you’re reading this and you’re wont to buzzwords, for the love everything fresh and personable, please don’t include them in an email to me. Hit me with a “Yo, Bett” and we’ll be pals forever. Emails should be fun to read.

So, uhm, the Daily Nation Life & Style blog, the one I write personal finance with on Mondays, have these subheadings in their stories that peeve the hell out of me. I will use there here, today. Right now. Hahha.

Chubby
I’m doing great, Nyambura. I really am. Your hugs have warmed me up the more.

I went through the stages of grief in about a month flat. Until my period returned and my uterine system rebooted to default. Telling myself this as often as I could helped me wrap things up unusually quick. I told myself: there’s absolutely nothing you did, or could have done, to change how it turned out. Absolutely nothing.

It had nothing to do with you. You’re only a body that hosted the egg.

I look at Muna and her flat chubby feet and in retrospect, she came at the perfect time. In His time. She wasn’t planned for or waited for, neither were our lives planned around having her by such and such a time, she came when she came and it couldn’t have been a more perfect time.

So when the little brats eventually come – the twin boys I’d joked to God about – they’ll come at the perfect time. In His time.

Can I hear an amen?

Hahha.

African pot
I have two sisters-in-law – both of them crazy girls, both of them extroverts, both of them with very large, very heavy clay pot of words that never seem to run out. I didn’t know how anyone could speak for three hours straight without tiring, until I began to hang with them.

It’s like… a human wonder.

One of them, the one with the big hair, gave me the name for this brand. Craft It.

I only told her what the brand would be about and what I intended to write, then she came up with a name.

I took it and ran with it as soon as she’d spoken it. My suggestions for a name were horrible, to say the least. Horrible. You should know the list of names I crossed out, what I had wanted to name Muna before I settled on Muna. It was the same cycle with naming Craft It.

Look though, naming a domain isn’t like naming a baby, Nyambura – at some point in the future, when you’re fed up with the name you kicked off with, you can ditch it and take up a new one.

It’s what rebranding is about.

Mullah
I don’t make money from this blog, Nyambura. I’ve never made a single shilling from the blog or any of my creative platforms.

That was the plan when I rebranded to Craft It, though. To write here for money – I wanted to approach brands to partner with and have me push their products and services on my platforms. Basically become an influencer. Or a brand ambassador. I prefer the term brand ambassador, though.

When I say ‘brand ambassador’, I readily think of Jason Statham pushing Audi in ‘The Transporter’.

‘Influencer’ makes me think of red lipstick and a local brand for bad wigs.

Anyway, my day job is as a writer and a columnist.

I write every day for money. That’s what puts these chinos on my ass.

Something awful happens when you begin to write for money. You lose the beauty of the art. Your creative license is compromised. The freedom to roam the wild country and stumble upon a bounty you didn’t even know you were searching for.

Somewhere along the way I realized I just want my own space to express myself and create for the sake of creating. In the words of Wanuri Kahiu – I want to to create fun, fierce and frivolous art for no reason but for the sake of it. (Goodness, did I just say space? SMH)

But you know what, Nyambura, it would be nice to pocket some dough from my words here. I put in some good effort to piece together the stories. Especially the interviews and photos.

Arggh… I really don’t know what I’m saying. I don’t know where I stand with this.

But anyway, I make money off the blog but not on the blog. Know what I mean?

I strongly believe I’m hacking being a columnist because of putting the work in my early years into the blog.

Kesho (hahaa)
It’s five minutes to six. The sun is taxing on its runway, building up pressure to dip into the horizon.

Let me head back to the digs. Muna may have replicated the Sistine Chapel while I was away.

Talk tomorrow?

11
Newton’s Law
That Kale chick

Comments (6)

  1. The Granny's Corner

    Somehow I read through it all. It started off as a fib. Sounded like somebody is drowning. It reminds me of this emotional bit in my all time favourite movie (definitely not transporters ); 3 idiots. Dude jumps out of the window, cracks his head and is out cold. A coma.

    His friends keep trying to do and stay stuff to bring him around. They even (I will bite off a curse word.) to buy the mum a new Saree; a beautiful piece. Doesn’t do shit. They don’t give up.

    The words to Nyambura came to me as well. And I echo those sentiments. Because I am in a Space (somebody shoot me) to comment.

    • Bett

      Hahhha.

      And you left me hanging there – so what becomes of the dude? Does he get to see his Mum again?

  2. W.K.

    I have been out for a month without internet access, and the minute I was back I just came on here…

    FOMO was real….

    Good to know you see and hear us cheering you on….

    It really does feel like we are seated across from each other, that’s what it’s about. I think

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Florence Bett-Kinyatti

@_craftit

Columnist Saturday Nation Writer Craft It Author of best-selling ‘SHOULD I?’ and ‘HOW MUCH?’ ~ Guiding word: Overdrive Subscribe to our Newsletter👇🏾 eepurl.com/igmN8P
  • Dear God, 
It’s me again.

I don’t pray as often as I need to, You know that. I don’t kneel by my bed in child-like humility, as Muna does. I don’t whisper a prayer in the morning. Or at noon. Perhaps just in the evening. 

This going-to-church habit is a constant false start. So is reading the Word. 

I’m often guilty but I also know: You and I have a language only we can understand. 

I speak to You through this gift You bestowed upon my Kale shoulders, this gift to write in colour. It’s a gift that sometimes feels like a curse, a burden I have no choice but to pursue. 

Yet other times – most times, actually – it’s the very breath of my essence. Everyday I sit to write, when the words flow from my head and heart through my fingers to the page, I feel You next to me. 

You are here, Lord. Hovering. Lingering. Swooshing about in Your regal robes, like a character from Bridgerton.

Sometimes You get so close I can feel You breathing on my neck and I’m like, ‘Err, God, do You mind, personal space?’

And You chuckle uncomfortably. ‘He-he, of course. Of course.’

I’m here to tell You, Thanks!

I hosted my first in-person event last March, Lord, thank You to all the lovely ladies who granted me their time and full attention. 

I’ve carried them in my heart since and every day, my prayer is that You bring them closer to the life of abundance they each seek. To their own version of wealth. 

I always call them by their name: Becky. Purity. Lindsay. Wangui. Naomi. Shiqow. Mercy. Liz. Winnie. Polly. Nduta. Lynet. 

And Mike. 

Dear Lord, I’m prepping for my next in-person event in June, Inshallah. 

Walk with me as I get there. 

Love always,
Me

#craftit
  • Highlights from our first-ever in person event hosted by Craft It and @financialfitbit 
Thanks to all the lovely ladies — and gent, hehe — who honoured us with the privilege of their time and attention. And colourful energy. It’s been weeks since and it’s only now that I’m coming down from the high. 

Thank YOU!

🎥 @mikemuthaka 

#craftit #author #MakeYourMoneyMatter #personalfinance #money
  • I am a woman.

I’m strong. I’m brilliant. I’m like a comet shooting across the sky, I’m so bright you have to put on shades to see me.

I’m almost 40, I’m almost fully realising myself as a woman and the power of womanhood I possess.

I’m so powerful that if KPLC connected me to the national grid, I’d power up this country and we’d never have another blackout.

Ho! Ho! Ho!

Anyway.

To recognize and celebrate International Women’s Day today, I’d like to recognize and celebrate eight women.

I have eight things to give away to each of these women:
a) Two tickets to my upcoming event on March 18 with @financialfitbit Theme is ‘Make your money matter’
b) Three autographed copies of my book ‘Should I?’
c) Three autographed copies of my other book ‘How Much?’

To participate:
1. Like this post
2. Tag women who deserve a win of either event ticket or book (tag as many women as you like)
3. Tell us what you’d like her to win and why she deserves the win
4. Make sure your tagged women follow @_craftit and @financialfitbit 

Here are the rules for the giveaway:
— One woman, one win
— Winners will be contacted via DM
— Giveaway closes at the end of this week, Inshallah, on Sunday 12 March
— Only open to people living in Kenya

All the best!

(Swipe right to see the women I’m celebrating.)

#craftit #internationalwomensday
  • My 2022 word of the year was Wholesome. 

Wholesome meant engaging in moderation and in pursuits that didn’t leave me feeling yucky.

An example: there’re weekend nights I’d go out then have too much to drink. On the drive home, I’d tell GB to stop the car every half mile so I could throw up on the side of the road. Then I’d take three working days recovering. 

Ha-ha.

No more of that nonsense.

Now I have only two doubles of Singleton whiskey and chase it with water. I eat less food and I eat better. I take my supplements. I treat myself to an early bedtime and arise with my body clock, no alarm.

I spend a lot more time hanging with my kids, Muna and Njeeh. 

I buy fewer things. 

I play the piano. 

I created a disciplined routine for my work and take Thursdays off. 

You catch my drift…

Wholesome has become my lifestyle. 

(By the way, I was asked, ‘Where does this word-of-the-year come from, Bett?’ I don’t know about other people but for me, the words present themselves when I’m journaling. My spirit tells me what it needs; I must be still enough to listen and brave enough to obey.)

My word for 2023 is Overdrive.

My two books have unlocked new opportunities for me as a writer and creative. As an urban brand. I’d honestly not foreseen them. 

I know that if I adjust my sails to where the wind is blowing, these opportunities will translate to wealth.

Last Friday, I listed all the work I’m already doing and all the new opportunities – potential and realised – knocking at my door.

I asked myself, ‘What am I taking up here and what am I dropping?’

The response, ‘None – we go into overdrive and smartly pursue them all.’

#craftit #urbanguide
  • Years ago, my best friend said to me, ‘Bett, we’re almost 40 – forget makeup, let’s take care of our skin instead.’

I had to laugh because this was coming from Terry. Terry my Kisii pal, this fine gyal with skin the colour of honey, the only practising SDA in my circle. 

Terry had spent her 20s and early 30s sleek with Arimis. That’s right, the milking jelly with a lactating cow on its logo. 

Arimis addressed all her skin pickles back then. It was her problem fixer. Her Olivia Pope. It’s the one thing that always said, It’s handled.

Now here she was preaching to us about a consistent skincare regimen in the AM and PM.

Ha!

It wasn’t until Terry shared her selfies on our girls WhatsApp group that I stopped laughing. It wasn’t until we stood next her – and took these selfies – that I reeally stopped laughing: Terry’s skin was youthful and toned, plump. Hydrated. Moistured but not shiny. 

It looked like it had been kissed by the Greek goddess of radiance. 

So we gathered around her feet and said, ‘Forgive us, master. We are ready now. Teach us everything you know.’

She did. 

Terry and I now spend plenty of time before work and before bed squeezing out little portions of expensive skincare products from expensive tubes, we layer them on our face in a calculated measure.

This serum here is for the circles under my eyes and the fine lines around my mouth.

Turns out I’ve been giving away too much of my face: I’ve been looking too hard, laughing too easily.

I’ll have to spend the next year into my 40s with my eyes half shut and laughing little. I'll have a resting bitch face.

Don’t blame me, blame the retinol.

And age.

#craftit #urbanguide #urbangirl
  • I’m Bett. I’m the author of your favourite books about money. I’m hosting an in-person event in March, Inshallah: This is my personal invite to you.

#craftit #moneymaker #moneyinkenya
  • I am hosting my first money event this March, Inhsallah. It’s the first of quarterly events I have planned for the year. 

(Give me a moment here so I pull myself together long enough to write this. I’m smiling very hard right now, ha-ha, I look like a donkey.)

(Ahem.)

The event will be in-person. On a Saturday morning, a loose three hours which, I am certain, you’d have burned on some other pursuit you couldn’t account for later. (I’d probably be oiling the hinges of a squeaky door or decluttering my sock drawer.)

My guest host for this edition is Lynet Kyalo. 

Lynet is a personal finance coach under her brand @financialfitbit She also hosts @getyourbagrightpodcast 

Buy your tickets from our Market.

Early bird tickets are discounted until the end of this month.

Limited slots available. 

#craftit #millenialmoney #moneyevent #moneymaker
  • Sometimes I sit down and read my own book. 

Odd, huh?

Reading my own stories is like an out-of-body experience. Or getting introduced to myself again. An outward journey inward.

It’s fascinating.

I also read because I need to improve my writing for my next project.

We call them the Elements of Craft: things like sentence structure and punctuation, word placement, story length etc, they all inform your reading experience.

This is what makes the book easy to read, and has you turning the pages.

Cop your autographed copy and #betteryourmoney 

#craftit #howmuch #millenialmoney #moneymaker
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